Anxiety

Re-post I wrote this a few months back but wanted to share it again.

I don’t understand it.  I don’t get it. I am so confused by it.  

How can I physically feel the symptoms? How can I physically feel the pain? It feels real. It is real. I’m not lying. I’m not trying to get attention.

I Am Not Imagining It

The un-easy feeling. I feel like something is going to happen. My stomach feels like it’s in knots, then the knots turn into a nauseous feeling. I’m scared, but of what? “They” say it’s my…..ANXIETY

The lump in my throat. I could feel it, every time I swallowed, I knew it was there. I didn’t want to tell my doctor because I worried he would say I was dying. After a couple months it went away and I was so relieved. But it came back. I finally got the courage to talk to my doctor, he said it was…..ANXIETY. I didn’t believe him. Further test and an x-ray proved he was right, there was no lump. There was nothing there, it was my ANXIETY.

The weird feelings in my head. I went to the emergency room several times. I thought I had a tumor, I thought I was going to die. I had test done, and then some more because once again I still didn’t believe the doctors. They were right, everything was fine, it was my…..ANXIETY

I’m so scared, not sure what I’m scared of, but yet I’m scared of everything…..ANXIETY

Every knew pain, every old pain, even every explained pain…..ANXIETY

I’m worried about going out, worried about staying home. What if I pass out? What if I get hurt? What if you get hurt?…..ANXIETY

I’m worried about being in a crowded room, a crowded store, even more worried about being all alone. Something bad might happen, what will I do? What will my family do?…..ANXIETY

Worried about my family, worried about my friends. Are they alright? Will they be alright? ANXIETY

I’m scared of this, and scared of that. I’m scared of things I have no control over. ANXIETY

I have seen a doctor, a therapist, and I’m in counseling. They all say the same thing ANXIETY

How can anxiety cause such real intense sensations? How do I make myself believe everything I’m feeling is anxiety when I am convinced its something else? How do I accept I have extremely bad anxiety and how do I learn to live and cope with it?

Try to replace a negative thought with a positive thought.

My answer to that is I’m going to take one day at a time. I’m going to continue with counseling, and continue to think positive. I have said this before and I am saying it again, I’m going to continue to live, laugh, and find my joy. It’s going to be hard, its going to take a lot of work, but I will try, and I will keep on trying, one day at a time.

If you know someone that has anxiety, DO NOT tell them to “get over it”. DO NOT tell them they are a hypochondriac, and DO NOT tell them they are crazy. I have heard these things before and it made me feel worse. It made me want to hide and made me feel alone.

If you know someone that has anxiety, be there for them. Let them know they can talk to you. Let them know you will help them through it. Have compassion, and let them know they are not alone.

If your suffering, speak up, reach out, and ask for help.

Have a wonderful week 🙂

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