Weekly Check-In

Hello everyone, hope your all doing well and enjoying your Saturday.

My week started off bumpy.  My teenager has covid, 6 days later and he is finally feeling better. Still sick, but much better. We have never had covid, and he got it pretty bad. So far I feel fine, but I’m not in the clear yet.

One of my favorite neighbors just told me that they might be moving, next weekend. This news makes me a little sad because they are more than just neighbors, they are my friends. They also happen to be my “go-to” when my anxiety or panic attacks make an appearance. They understand what I go through. Still, whether they stay or move, I wish them much happiness.

To top off my week, I checked my mail yesterday and discovered a letter informing me of a rent increase. Such wonderful news, just what a single mom on a fixed income wants to hear. (Sarcasm)

This morning when I woke up I felt a little off. I immediately went into “freak out” mode, because I know that “off” feeling sometimes means a panic attack is about to start. But it didn’t. Maybe I felt like that because of my weekly events taking a toll on me. After doing some grounding excersises, and taking my medication, I am feeling better.

This week has been a difficult one. I have plenty more I could share, but I don’t want this post to be completely gloomy.

So where do I go from here? I can continue to let my bad week bring me down, maybe take a nap and sleep until I feel better. That was my original plan. But as I sit here and write this post I have decided to handle this a different way.

For one, I am going to be grateful. Grateful that my son is getting better. 6 days is a long time to be sick, and as a parent, it’s so hard watching your child feel so miserable. So I am grateful he is getting better. I’m even grateful that he feels well enough to play his video games.

And even though my neighbors might be moving, I am grateful I had the pleasure of meeting and becoming friends with them. I know we will remain friends even after they move.

I am not happy about my rent increase, but I am grateful that I have a roof over my head. Yes, the increase will hurt a little, but I will just re-budget and adjust.

Even though I woke up feeling “off”, I am grateful that at least I woke up.

Its strange how you can have one week that was filled with positivity and the next with much negativity. It’s easy to let the negative take over and bring you down. I do that quite often. I let all those bad things take up so much room in my head that all the good things get lost.

So as I sit here writing about my “bumpy” week, I have decided to push all that out of my mind, as best I can. I will replace it with the things I am grateful for. I will make the best out of it, and make today a day to be grateful for.

I am going to use my quarantine time to laugh with my son, eat ice-cream, and just enjoy our quality time, just me and him because nobody is allowed near us for a few more days. Who knows, maybe I will finally learn how to play that darn video game he enjoys so much.

No matter what kind of day you are having, there is always something to be grateful for, take a moment to find it.

Hope you have a fabulous weekend!

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Covid, Anxiety, And Being Confused

The whole time we have been in a pandemic, I have NOT been scared of getting covid. Me, the person with bad anxiety, horrible panic attacks, and of course let’s not forget about my OCD, not afraid of a pandemic? Well, that was untill recently.

I usually worry about everything. It’s really hard to believe that I wasn’t worried about getting covid. But that has now changed.

Here’s what has been going on in my mind the past few weeks…..

It’s A Little Confusing

I’m confused.  The vaccinated are still getting covid, AND they are still able to spread it.

A little confusing

The non-vaccinated are still getting covid, AND they are still able to spread it.

Some vaccinated people blame it on the non-vaccinated…..

And…..

And some non-vaccinated people blame everyone…….even the vaccinated.

I’m Confused

Did you get the vaccine?….Did you not get the vaccine? Should you get it? Should you not? Does it make a difference? Or does it not?

Some people say yes it makes a difference, and some say no it does not.

Some people feel that there’s no point of getting the vaccine because they might still get sick.

Some schools now allow the kids to sit next to each other and there are no longer plastic shields surrounding their desks. They DO need to wear their masks, but only While In Class.

I’m Confused

While the kids are out on the playground, or while at lunch, NO masks are required and social distancing is NOT reinforced.

I’m Confused

Confused yet? I am!

Some people are getting very sick and need hospital attention while others barely have any symptoms.

Some people have died from covid and some have died from the vaccine.

It’s all so confusing

I’m sure for those of you that don’t struggle with anxiety it may leave you confused. When you DO have anxiety let me tell you, it is confusing but also extremely scary.

So what do you do? Do you keep living in fear of the unknown? Do you take that chance with whatever decision you make and pray for the best? The choice is yours. But here is what I am going to do…..

I’m going to put my faith over my fear. I’m going to live each day and I’m going to continue to find my joy. Of course I’m still worried, scared, and on some days nervous and terrified. But I have horrible anxiety and it’s something I have to live with. I can live each day in fear or I can take each day as a blessing and pray for the best. The choice is yours and whatever choice you make I wish you the best. Don’t let fear stop you from finding your joy.

If you or someone you know is struggling with mental illness, Reach Out, Speak Up, And Ask For Help. Nobody should go through it alone.

Have a wonderful weekend.

#mentalhealthmatters