Broken Bones

Have you ever broken a bone?

Hello WordPress buddies! I’m going to jump right in and answer the question.

Yes, I did break a bone. Actually I broke my foot two years ago and four months later I broke my toe. But let me explain my broken foot to you.

I had just woken up from a nap on my couch. After a nice long stretch  I got up and started to walk into the kitchen. I didn’t realize my foot was asleep.  I took a step and immediately felt pain. Horrible horrible pain which caused me to fall into the nearest chair.

The pain was probably the worst I ever felt. Well at least it felt like it at the time. After about 20 long minutes the pain became more bearable.

My foot started to bruise badly. The pain was much better though and I was able to lightly walk on the heal of my foot. My sister encouraged me to get in the car because she was taking me to the emergency room. She knew my foot was broken.

At the hospital they confirmed it was broken.  I got referred to a specialist where I was then told I would need surgery. Apparently the break was pretty bad. From what I understand, because my foot was asleep and I couldn’t feel it, I apparently put pressure on the wrong area or something like that.

As most of you know I have anxiety and panic attacks.  The thought of surgery really frightened me. I did not want to go through with it and actually almost didn’t.

Before surgery they put my foot in a “soft” cast and told me I couldn’t take it off and I couldn’t put any pressure on my foot.

Well I woke up in the middle of the night in a panic.  I had to take that temporary cast off. I couldn’t handle it being on. Apparently I was going through some type of claustrophobic experience and to make a long story short I ended up taking it off. I had to go back to the doctors the next day and they put another soft cast on with instructions to leave it on this time until the surgery date. Well I tried. But once again I woke up with that terrifying feeling that I had to it off. I can’t even properly describe the feeling I had. I just had to take it off, my foot needed to breath. So, again I unwrapped the bandages and took the cast thingy off.

So fast forward to the day of surgery. I told the surgeon I did not want a hard cast. I told him if I wake up from surgery and find a hard cast on my foot that the minute I got home I would find a way to take it off. I explained to him how I took the soft cast off and if I had a hard cast I definitely would do the same. He was very understanding and when I woke up after surgery I had a “soft” cast.

I never really thought I was claustrophobic before, but that feeling I got when I woke up and had to take that cast off was a feeling I don’t want to experience again.  Pure panic! My foot, head, my skin, everything felt like it was suffocating. I know how strange that sounds but it was horrible.

After surgery I did end up keeping the soft cast on during the day but each night before bed I would unwrap it. I became a pro at wrapping and un wrapping the bandages.

One thing I want to add is because I had surgery I was not able to walk for three months. I wasn’t allowed to put any pressure on the foot at all. I was told to use crutches. I tried so hard but was unable to get the hang of it. I actually crawled a few times until a friend showed up at my door with a knee scooter. That thing was wonderful! I was able to get around. So if anyone ever is unable to walk on one foot I HIGHLY recommend getting one.

So there’s my story of my broken bone. Oh yea one more thing which I mentioned in the beginning of this post. I also broke my toe. When my foot finally healed and I was able to walk, I stubbed my pinky toe so hard I ended up breaking it. And to make matters worse it just so happened to be on the same foot that I broke.

At that point I was tired of doctors. I didn’t go in for the broken toe. I let it heal on its own. It actually looks a little silly now because it healed straight out….or sideways. You can’t really notice unless you compare it to the other pinky toe on my other foot. But hey its a good conversation starter when it is noticed. Lol

Have a wonderful day,



What’s On My Mind?

Well hello WordPress community. Hope all is well in your part of the world.

Here in California the weather has been warm. Thats all good and dandy…..except for people like me that prefer cooler weather.  But it is what it is, and I am making the best of it. 😁

I have been doing so much thinking lately.  I am 52 years old and I am no where close to being where I want to be, physically, emotionally, financially, and most of all mentally.

Lately I have also been questioning the single life. I have been single for many years.

I have always been fine with my single status. I was use to it and being single really didn’t matter to me. I became set in my ways and use to doing things on my own.

But I have been imagining what it would be like to actually be in a relationship. I picture having a friend, a companion.

Having someone in my life that is just there, there as in sitting next to me while watching tv, or running to the store with. Someone to laugh with, to talk with. Someone that is there for the little things as well as the big.

It would also be great to have help with all the little things around the house. The other day I had to move a tv from one room to the other. That was the easy part. The hard part was figuring out all the cords and where or what they connect to. Took me forever to figure it out and its still not completely right because now I am not able to turn the volume up using the remote.

I have been trying to come up with ideas on how to fix certain issues in my life and how to get to where I want to be.

I had a friend ask me the other day to keep an eye on their house while they went out of town. They decided on the spur of the moment to do something fun with their kids. I thought to myself how wonderful it would be if I could do something like that. But I can’t. Mentally there is no way I could leave my house that long and if I could, financially it would be impossible.

My mental health may be better than it was but I am not as far along as I want to be. I know it takes time, but dang how long and how hard do I have to work at this until I am where I want to be?

This post is not supposed to be so negative. I apologize if it is. It just helps me to write out everything.  Its therapeutic in a way.

I don’t know why I am doing all this “thinking” lately. Maybe its because I have a birthday in July and I will be another year older. Maybe I am comparing myself to people around me to much. I have no idea.

What I do know is if I want things to change, if I want to find some happiness and be in a better place, I need to take a stand and make a change. After all, nothing changes if nothing changes.

Hope you all have a fantastic week,


Mental Health Month

Hello everyone hope all is well in your part of the world. May is mental health month so I thought I would discuss a few things.

I want to share with you some important information about ocd, and what type of treatment would be beneficial to someone that is struggling.

There are several types of therapy that can be effective in treating OCD (Obsessive Compulsive Disorder), but the most commonly recommended and the one that I personally believe in is Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT), specifically a form of CBT called Exposure and Response Prevention (ERP).

ERP involves gradually exposing the ocd sufferer to situations or objects that trigger their obsessions while preventing them from engaging in their usual compulsive behaviors.

This process is done with the help of a therapist, and the individual is encouraged to sit with their “discomfort” and anxiety, until it starts to decrease. (Much easier said than done)

I have been doing this kind of therapy on my own for the past 6 months. I do not recommend doing ERP without a therapist.  Even though I am doing it, it is very difficult and a lot of hard work. Even though I am working hard I am still not committed as much as I should be and I am still struggling deeply.

I am only doing this on my own because at the moment I am finding it extremely difficult to find a qualified ocd specialist near me that accepts my medical insurance. And because I know how effective erp therapy is, I decided for me it’s better to try it alone than not try at all.

It’s important to consult with a mental health professional to determine the best course of treatment for each individual’s  needs, so please don’t do anything without consulting with your doctor first.

If you are like me and are finding it hard to find a specialist I encourage you to check with the International OCD Foundation first. There you will find all the information you need about OCD and they will search your area for a specialist for you. Here is their information.

If you can’t find someone in your area I highly recommend contacting NAMI.  They are awesome.  They even have a 24 hour help line that you can call and just chat with someone. They have helped me so much in the past and I can’t say enough good things about them. Plus they offer help for other mental illnesses, not just OCD and anxiety.

Both of these places are wonderful, educational, and helpful.  Please reach out to them and discuss your concerns and situation.

Reach Out, Speak Up, And Ask For Help. Nobody should go through it alone.


Answering Questions

Hello everyone hope your all enjoying your week so far.

This morning I was reading, commenting, and catching up on some blogs that I follow. On the blog, Trailblazer the author posted some questions for us readers to answer and share. Here are the questions and my answers:

1. How many times per week do you post?

I usually don’t post weekly.  I am more of a twice a month blogger, but there have times I post more often.

2. How many blogs do you follow?

I follow around 75 blogs.

3. Do you read all the blogs you follow?

Yes, I try to read every blog that I follow. But, since I do follow so many there are times that I don’t read every single thing they have written. That’s usually because its something that doesn’t interest me at the time or maybe it just doesn’t apply to me. But I do check their blogs regularly and I do bookmark certain posts so I can read at a later time.

4. Do you seek out new blogs to follow?  

Oh yes all the time. I am always on the lookout for new blogs.

5. Do you comment on the blogs you read?

I do comment but not every time. Usually I will “like” the post so the writer knows I read and enjoyed it. I never “like” a post unless I have read it.

6. What content inspires you to follow a blogger?

Very good question.  Since I write about mental illness I am always looking for similar blogs. However, since I love love love to read short stories, I am constantly searching for fiction short stories.  Reading is one of my hobbies so if you happen to know of any blogs that might interest me please let me know. 😁

7. Do you add a photo to your post?

When I first started blogging I would always add a couple photos, but now that I realized I can only have so many with my current WordPress plan, I don’t add photos very often.

8. Leave me a link for one blogger (other than yourself) that you think I should check out.

There are so many that I enjoy so picking just one is not an easy task for me. Hummm….. ok I am going to go with Beetleypete. Pete writes about a variety of things including his awesome dog Ollie. But what I love most about Pete’s blog are his short stories.  He has alot to choose from and I have enjoyed every single one that I have read so far.

If you would like to participate and answer these questions or if you want to read what others wrote, Click here and check out Trailblazers blog for all the details.

Have a fantastic week,